Saturday, December 17, 2011

That Traitorous Thing


Hope is a bitch.
I’ve said that SO many times before, and I wish I could learn that lesson for good, once and for all, but no matter what happens somehow I cannot seem to give up on it. Which if you think about, is horrible. Really.
If only we could go about our lives without processing it all, and remembering it all, there would never be the need for this continuous analysis that our brain does. The brain would shut up. At least for a bit. And hope would die, just for a little while. Think of just how peaceful that would be. 

But right now, hope simply refuses to give up. It eats away every bit of strength you have and struggling is futile. Simply because it’s so easy to hope, to think, to dream, to want. And reality, reality is so different. It’s so difficult.

And the worst part, despite knowing all of this, and just how evil hope is, I still can’t make my head shut up.  And  so I wish there was a remote- one that would stop this incessant buzzing- the constant words our brain feeds into our hearts. I wish there was a way to turn that off, just for a while. Sometimes maybe just for a good night’s sleep.

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