Wednesday, September 7, 2011

A Storm I Can't Escape

A few minutes ago it had been a clear sunny day and there was even a slight breeze. It was perfect picnic weather. In a matter of seconds the stormy clouds had taken over what they believed was once rightfully theirs. They had captured the skies and slain the sunshine; the brightness was all but gone.

It was a torrential downpour and the rain refused to stop, much like my thoughts. I looked out of the glass doors and I could barely see a thing. Normally if you looked out you could always see the winding roads, the houses and offices that were dwarfed by this building and a few dozen people in the alley. But today, today you couldn’t see a thing. The rain was in a way blinding. It clouded your vision, your judgment and you could just barely make out the outlines. You couldn’t see what lay within. Not a soul could be seen outside and even the animals and birds had fled, as if they knew of what was to come. The sound- the thundering pitter patter, the deafening war-cry, the roar of the thunder took over as the soundtrack as the rain continued to pelt down steadfastly.

This rain, was like you, like your love- blinding me.

You infuriate me. You make me angry, drive me mad and leave me just flustered and confused. And while I do believe that I have fallen in love with you, I just wish you would leave. Because it's easier to live without you than go through this everyday.

This rain, was like you, like your love- blinding me.
And I was like a deer frozen in the headlights- simply stuck, magnetized or maybe just awestruck. I couldn’t look away and I couldn’t not think. And this one thought took over my mind- How did life change so suddenly? It wasn’t exactly fair. How did things go from being so spectacularly awesome, so unbelievable beautiful to so utterly heartbreaking? How? Just how?


Growing Up

I have a new life philosophy- There's nothing I can do about it.
Actually it's the old one only- You can't fight Fate. Whatever happens, happens.
But this new one I think just makes it more clear. Because it spells out the fact that you simply CANNOT do anything.
I still don't have all the answers I want, but if there's anything I've learnt in the past two days its that life goes on. It just does. And you don't have a choice in this matter. And Life honestly doesn't give a damn if you agree or diasgree or if you're happy and content or not.
It's going to go where it has to. So you might as well pick yourself up and get on with it, because the end, like always, will come. And it isn't in your hands.
So maybe it doesn't matter, maybe it's a good thing, great even, that all those questions are unanswered. Time as usual will tell.
And if the end isn't happy, well, that's when you go kill everyone who told you it would be a happy one right?
And another tragic truth that I realise today- I'm growing up. I'm turning into a left-brain person (sheesh) and somehow there's nothing I can do about it.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Happy Endings is just a Bollywood Thing

There were a lot of things on my mind today that I wanted to write about, and this wasn't one of them but life is like that no? Largely unexpected and annoyingly unpredictable.
Bombay Duck is a Fish is not a book I ever want to read again. But I know I will. I will read it several times.
I'm a sucker for romance, for witty writing and even then its not at all easy to get me hooked to a book. I have to really believe in it, connect with someone, something or even one line. And if I do, then I literally live the book. The characters are my best friends and I live with them. I see bits of me, or bits of others in their quirks and little habits, in their eccentricities and their pain, in their hopes and their heartbreak.
And this one had no romance, only heartbreak. No wit, only the irony of life. But it also had Bombay, Bollywood, SRK. And somehow, beyond all logical reasoning, I liked the protagonist. And even though the story was rather morbid right from the start, I hoped for a bollywood ending. And I guess my point here is that it doesn't happen right? In real life.
Happy endings- do they exist?
I know SRK says they do, and with every movie of his he makes me believe in them. And they say art, cinema especially mirrors real life. But how, how can happy endings possibly exist?